Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
How do I convince my girlfriend to wear longer dresses? She wears short skirts that make me worried about her safety.
She ought to be able to wear anything she likes. You should be worried about why men seem to have an issue with what women wear, rather than focus on their own behaviour. She is not the problem here.
I was forced to have sex with my boyfriend for a few months, despite not wanting to, simply because he blackmailed me emotionally into doing it. I didn’t enjoy it at all and it’s what eventually made me end the relationship. I recently found out that he has since been dating a common friend, and when I asked her about it, she said he was forcing her to do the same thing. This guy obviously has a problem. My friend is too emotionally vulnerable to end the relationship, so she will probably give him what he wants, which makes me incredibly angry. It isn’t a crime, because these are two consenting adults, but I still think of him as a manipulator who shouldn’t be allowed to get away with this sort of behaviour. How do I stop him?
If you were forced to have sex, it is a crime and can be treated as such. Please speak to a family member or counsellor about this. If it wasn’t forced, and you believe you were emotionally tricked into doing it, this occupies a grey area I can’t really comment on. Having said that, what happens between your ex-boyfriend and his current girlfriend is unfortunately their business alone, unless you strongly believe a crime is taking place and you have proof to back it. She clearly doesn’t believe this to be the case, which means you are using your past experience with him to comment on his current relationship. If sex is between two consenting adults, we can’t really have a say in it, irrespective of our opinions about it.
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