Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
Q. My partner doesn't enjoy any of the things I do. I try and enjoy all the things he likes, but he never reciprocates. What can I do to change this?
A. If you enjoy the music of Baba Sehgal, I'm afraid I have to agree with your partner. Having said that, there is no rule that states two people in a relationship must enjoy everything together. You are allowed to have individual preferences, because your likes and dislikes define who you are. If your partner doesn't enjoy the things you do, ask yourself if he has tried them as often as you would have liked him to. If, for example, you enjoy sushi and he doesn't despite trying it five times, you have to come to terms with the fact that he just doesn't like sushi. Your ability to try and enjoy the things he does is great, but doesn't necessarily mean he has to possess the same ability too. Ask him why he doesn't enjoy the things you like. If he has a reasonable explanation, accept it. Don't thrust your likes onto someone else simply because you believe they should agree with you. You would hate it if he were to do that to you.
Q. I haven't been in a relationship for over five years, after my first and only girlfriend dumped me. I am too scared to speak to women because I'm afraid of them dumping me again. Will I ever find love and have a normal life?
A. You would be surprised at the number of people who get dumped every minute. There's someone dumping someone even as you read this. All of these people, the world over, bounce back, because they recognise that rejection is a part of the dating experience. If someone dumps you again, you should learn to take it on the chin and move on. Why ruin your present by pre-empting a scenario that may never occur? Yes, you may be dumped again. You may also find love. Why deny yourself the possibility?
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