'He doesn't talk to me anymore...'

Dear Diana,
I’ve been going out with this guy for six months now. Last week, he suddenly started behaving strangely with me. He now avoids me and says he is in no mood to talk. We are part of a common group of friends and even when we are together we barely converse. His silence is killing me. I just end up being angry about his behaviour.

Illustration/Amit Bandre
Illustration/Amit Bandre

I’ve tried asking him, but he stays mum. I really don't know what to do. I spoke to his sister about his behaviour. I thought she would be understanding, but things backfired. I do not know what exactly she told him because he appeared even more agitated after that. I only want to know what has caused this sudden change in behaviour. If only he would tell me exactly what is wrong, I would let him be. His attitude is irritating me. Why can’t he explain what is going on in his mind?
— Shaila

Dear Shaila,
It is clear that this man is not interested in you. He would not have behaved in this manner if he really cared for you. He owes you an explanation. It is okay if he wants to move on, but he needs to tell you. By maintaining a silence will not solve his problem, it will add to it as you want to know what went wrong. Right now he is in no mood to talk, so just let him be. Instead, you too keep mum.

You are hurt and as he has not told you what went wrong, stop pleading with him to give you an explanation. Avoid talking to his sister and other family members. When you are hanging out with the common group of friends, just be normal. Talk only when spoken to and behave as if you are unaffected. It will be tough, but you have to do it. Constantly asking will only make him more adamant to keep quiet, so just let him be for now.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at, or fax her on 24150009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

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