I'm 21 and worried about my looks. I am studying for my graduation and when I look around in college, I feel everyone else looks good. I suffer from severe confidence issues as I feel I am not good looking. I keep looking at myself in the mirror and taking snapshots of myself and deleting them in disgust. Due to this I have low self-esteem and I find themselves continuously comparing myself with others. There is also another issue. I feel incredibly small in the genital department. Does size really matter? As I am insecure about my physical appearance, I have no girlfriends. All my friends have girlfriends except me. What do I do to regain my confidence? My close pal tells me I need counselling. What do I do to be like the rest of my pals? How do I get rid of my inferiority complex?
Illustration/ Amit Bandre
What your friend tells you is right. It is all in the mind. Think good, feel good. So as a first step stop stressing upon how you look and immediately stop making comparison notes about how others look. To each his own. No two people are alike, even twins have something that distinguishes them from each other. It's okay to be self-conscious once in a while because it means that you care about how you look and you actually try to improve. But you are on an overdrive which is detrimental to your well being. You should love yourself the way you are. Also, size does not matter, but if you feel that is an issue you can seek medical advice. The best bet for you is to be yourself. You are unique in your way, so why feel inferior to anyone? Once you refrain from thinking how you look and appear, you will be a more confident person.
Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at firstname.lastname@example.org, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012