'I am finding it difficult to move on...'

Dear Diana,
I divorced my wife a year ago. My five-year-old son lives with my ex-wife who now stays at her parental home in Delhi. During the divorce proceedings, I cut myself off from everything. It was only office and home for me. I ended up losing a lot of my pals. Also, as most were known to my wife too, they kept away as they did not know who to side with. Our marriage soured when she started doubting whatever I did. She was of a suspicious nature, so she could never trust me. I did try my best to make her happy, but we could not reconcile our differences. I now want to move on, but it is proving to be difficult for me. I am finding it difficult as there are a lot of memories attached to the home. Should I look for another place? How do I forget whatever has happened. I want to give marriage a second shot. I have no friends and the only interaction I have is with my office colleagues.
— Lalit


Dear Lalit,
Moving to a new place is an expensive proposition. Can you afford such an expenditure? Even if you shift to a new home, you cannot expunge the memories. They will always be part of your life. What you need to do is to seek closure. Emotional upheavals take a long time to heal. You are divorced, your child is with your ex-wife and most of your friends have deserted you. You are feeling lonely as there is a vacuum in your life. You can give marriage a second shot. But as they say once bitten, twice shy. So be wary before you connect with someone again. For starters, hang out with a fresh set of people. It will take a while so you will need to have loads of patience. But you never know when and where you might meet that someone special. Also, what has happened is over, so stop mulling over the past.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

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