Dear Diana,
I'm a middle-aged single mother of a 18-year-old boy. Since I've got a full-time job I try my best to juggle my personal and professional life. The reason I'm writing to you is I recently found some pornographic CDs in my son's room. I know I shouldn't be nosy as he's in college and is pretty mature but I just can't get myself to accept his interest in such stuff. I don't know whether I should confront him about it or just overlook this as a part of his growing up days. I don't want him to feel distressed either. Can you tell me whether it's a big deal or not?  
- Dinah

Illustration/ Satish Acharya

Dear Dinah,
I can understand your situation but look at it this way that your son is not doing things at the sly. The fact that he has brought the CDs home, and is fully aware that you might find it, is a clear indication that he does not want to hide things. He could have watched the blue film at a friends house or in some seedy video parlour and you may have never known. It is best to ignore it, if you confront him he will get agitated as to why you are going through his stuff. This is all part of a guy's growing up years interest. You need to worry only if he becomes obsessed with such movies. I am sure that this is just a one off thing. If you repeatedly find such CDs then you can ask him, for now it is best to let it be.