I am married with a seven-year-old daughter. I am close to one of my husband’s friends. He is my husband’s best buddy. He is also married and has two kids. I’ve always had a thing for him. What I mean is that I find him attractive. I feel he, too, has a thing for me. But all these years, we never displayed any affection for each other. We hung out together, went for holidays, but never crossed the line. Last weekend, we ended up spending time together. My husband and daughter were away when he dropped in. One thing led to another and we ended up having sex. We were both drunk that evening, and that probably played a big part. Ever since, I am filled with guilt, but he is behaving as if nothing happened. I have been avoiding meeting him, but he is as normal as he was before. What do I do? Does he not regret it?
Looks like you two got sozzled and one thing led to another. Things may have happened at the spur-of-the-moment and you two got carried away. He is turning a blind eye to the incident as it amounts to an extramarital affair for you and him. He perhaps feels it is better to act as if nothing happened. Or perhaps he was so drunk that he does not even recall what happened that evening. If he was in his senses, he might also be full of regret, but he prefers to forget the episode. Talking about it with you will only lead to more guilt. Telling his best buddy about it will create a storm in your marriage as well as end his friendship with your hubby. Avoid even broaching the subject with him as it will add to the guilt. It is best to forget it and not to find yourself in the same situation ever again.
Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at firstname.lastname@example.org, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012