'I'm finding it difficult to move on...'

Dear Diana,
I was seeing this guy for over a year. We talked about a future together, till he started behaving in an odd manner. He would lie to me about his whereabouts and then began avoiding me. I would wait for him for hours at a mall and he would not turn up. One day, he just walked away. I was shattered. The problem is that he did not even tell me what was irking him. I tried to get in touch with him, but he did not bother to respond. This hurt me even more, but it has been six months now that I have been trying to move on. Despite my best efforts, I just cannot get him out of my head. I miss him and often I just can't help thinking about him. How do I forget him? He seems to have moved on well and getting along with his life.
— Roma

Illustration/Uday Mohite
Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Roma,
It appears that you were serious about him while he was definitely not. You are still in love with him, even though your guy has dumped you. Considering the way he behaved, you need to be angry, rather than moan his loss. You are finding it difficult to move on as you did not get closure. Perhaps if he had explained the reason why he was behaving in an obnoxious manner, it would have helped you get over him. As he has cut off all ties from you, there is no need pining for him still. Keep yourself busy and look after yourself, even though it is easier said than done. Focus on yourself and do things that make you happy. Thinking about him or trying to find out what he is up to will only upset you even more. There could be another girl on his scene which he did not want to tell you about. Or perhaps he was bored of you and the relationship. Either way he owed you an explanation, but chose not to. So why even care for this man? You are better off without him.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

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