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I want to fall in love again

Updated on: 21 June,2011 08:54 AM IST  | 
Diana |

I am 39 and got divorced a year ago. My four-year-old daughter lives with my ex-wife. Initially I did not want my marriage to end

I want to fall in love again

Dear Diana,
I am 39 and got divorced a year ago. My four-year-old daughter lives with my ex-wife. Initially I did not want my marriage to end. But over a period of time, I realised that there was no point as my wife was an extremely headstrong person. My family was not too keen on our marriage. Yet, I went ahead as I loved her. But it proved to be a disaster. It was better for both of us to go our separate ways. For a while I just cut off ties from everyone - friends and family. Now I feel I should get back living my life. I would love to meet someone.u00a0 How do I go about it?
-u00a0Name withheld on request

Dear Friend,

You have started feeling lonely. But you are to blame for your situation. By living in isolation, you cut yourself from the world. It is tough going through a divorce, even tougher coping with it once it comes through. I am glad that over time, your wounds have been healed and you are ready to start anew. As a first step start with making new pals. Develop a social life, be more outgoing and let relationships develop on its own. However do not be in a tearing hurry to find a partner. Do not be under any pressure to find that someone if you are out in a crowd enjoying yourself. Just let things go on its own. I am sure you will find love again. Best of luck.

My friend is a compulsive liar

Dear Diana,

I am 19. One of my friends says really random things. He is a compulsive liar. Like for instance, one day he said he went to Pune. Two days later, he said he was watching a movie! If you ask him, he cooks up another story. Sometimes he is irritating but other times he is okay. Do I continue being friends with him?u00a0
- Avi

Dear Avi,
I can understand your predicament. You need lots of patience to tackle him. He is, as you have said, a compulsive liar. He does not realise what he is doing due to his disorder. Try explaining to him the next time he cooks up yet another yarn. He may not realise it but it may stop him for a while before lying again in front of you. It appears that he is just an acquaintance, let him remain that way. Do not get too close to him.

This girl likes me!

Dear Diana,
There's this girl in our group of friends who thinks I am interested in her! She has been talking about me and her love for me to whoever is willing to listen. I am not at all interested in her. She's just part of our circle as we are all in the same coaching class for our management course. How do I tell her that I am not into her?
-u00a0DD

Dear DD,

The next time any member of your group comes and tells you about her love for you, tell them to also pass on your reply. Request them to tell her that you are not interested at all! It's better to be clear and matter-of-fact at the outset. At the moment it is better that you concentrate on your studies and so does this girl.




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