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Movie Review: R... Rajkumar

Right at the beginning of this film, a mustachioed man says threateningly: ‘Jab convince karna mushkil hai toh confuse kar do’. So we can’t say the film-maker didn’t warn us about the rest of the movie beforehand. Well, since we unfortunately didn’t take the threat seriously and stayed on, here’s the review.

R... Rajkumar
Shahid Kapoor and Sonakshi Sinha in R... Rajkumar

The agenda of this film seems clear with precise points.

  1. Get an actress with enough flesh to look hot when she gets out of the water and make sure she gets out of sea, river, ponds and other such random water bodies as often as possible. The clothes sticking to the woman’s body makes her look 'hawt' as we don’t have the time and inclination to think about other ways to make her look sexy, this is the best bet.
     
  2. Get an obnoxiously behaved cocky loser type of a hero, who has a signature move (in this film, he’s shaking his shoulder to get the shirt back in place) as a constant reminder of his machismo. He takes 50, 60 and sometimes even 100 goons at a time provided the goons are gracious enough to wait for their turn when he is bashing up and tossing them around.
     
  3. Get some excruciatingly annoying actors who can desperately try to look menacing to play villains and then suggestively show their ‘bad side’ by making women in half-a-choli giving them a bath, massage or such other body (read bawdy) services.
     
  4. Bring back all that was bad with Hindi movies that we had gratefully left behind in the 80s and cram the classic 'ugh' factors in every scene possible. Get the hero to stalk the heroine till she coyly surrenders. Get the villain to slap a woman because she wouldn’t obey him. Get the lovebirds to do all sorts of immature things in the name of defiance. Get the…ok never mind.
     
  5. Ohho. We forgot to put the item number and now it’s all packed with nonsense…what to do? Eeny, meeny, miny, moe…let’s insert it just before the long drawn torturous climax. How does it matter anyway? For that matter, how does anything matter anyway after watching the film?

Shahid Kapoor , Sonakshi Sinha and Sonu Sood might have put in sincere performances but for a movie that is so awful, all their effort seems to be in vain. And yes, wish the ‘silent ho jaa nahi toh violent ho jaoonga’ threat was used on the man who scored the relentless, consistently bad and criminally loud background music.

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