'My family has second thoughts about my girlfriend...'

Dear Diana,
I have been hanging out with this girl for over three years. We met through common friends. I have not hid my relationship from my family. She often drops in at my home as well. We are both 27. Now her family is keen that she ties the knot. Last week, she told me about it. So I broached the subject with my parents and uncles. To my horror, they said that they did not approve of the girl's family. It came as a shock to me as I felt it was understood that I would marry her. Whenever she came home, they would be nice and cordial to her. My family tells me that friendship with her is fine, but she is not marriage material. I am confused. I am doing my level best to convince my family to do a rethink, but it looks tough. When I try to explain, I am told to shut up. I can't take this anymore. What do I do? I cannot leave the girl in the lurch after all these years.
— Vatsal

Illustration/Uday Mohite
Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dear Vatsal,
It is strange that you family has done a volte- face now. It appears that they did not think that you would marry her. This is even more strange as you were open about your relationship and did not keep her under wraps. Perhaps your family members thought you would not end up marrying her. From the looks of it, your family appears adamant and not at all keen on the marriage. If you care for your girl and are serious about her, explain to them that you are keen on her. You need to have a frank talk with them to keep their fears at rest. There is no need to antagonise your family as this will lead to even more problems. So it will require a lot of patience and cajoling on your part. Try to understand why your parents do not approve of her and then reason it out.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

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