'My father and boyfriend had a showdown...'

Dear Diana,
I have been with this guy for over a year. My father, however, doesn't approve of him. He thinks he is a good-for-nothing. We are both 25. Right now, we get along well, but are not thinking about the future. According to my father, I deserve someone better than him as he does not measure up to me. I am not even thinking of marriage presently, but my father is already adamant that I do not hang out with him. To me, he is the person I am most comfortable with. I have been having frequent arguments with my dad over him. He wants me to cut off all ties with my guy. To make matters worse, we bumped into him at a shopping mall. My dad did not want me to stop and talk to me, but I insisted. This led to a heated argument between my guy and my dad. He was told to steer clear of me and my father warned him to not pursue me. I really do not know what to do?
— Hemangini


Dear Hemangini,
Your dad is telling you to stay away from this guy before things turn serious. At the same time, your father's fears are unwarranted as you have clearly told him that he is dear to you, but you are not thinking of the future right now. He is concerned about you and there is something on his mind that is causing him to behave in such a manner. Your father appears to have expectations about the guy for you and probably feels this man doesn't live up to them. Why don't your ask your dad to express his anxieties about him? What is it about him that is of concern to hin? At the same time, you need to assure your dad that when you decide to take the relationship to the next level, you will take heed of what he says. For now, he cannot stop you from talking to him, till he tells you the exact reason and you are serious about him.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

  • Buddy28-Jul-2015

    I wonder sometime if the agony aunt is giving the right advise? When the girl herself says she is not thinking of getting married then why is still insists on continuing relationship with the guy? at that to at the cost of father-daughter relationship??

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