I knew my boyfriend for a year before we started being together. He was in an unhappy marriage. He said he would file for divorce from his estranged wife. We have been together for about four months now. Last week, he decided to go back to his estranged wife saying she wants to give him a second chance. What am I supposed to do now? I am a total wreck. He has used me physically and emotionally. I feel so cheated and helpless.
Illustration/ Amit Bandre
This guy took you for a ride promising you a future, but made an utter fool of you. You trusted him blindly while he was just using you to satisfy his sexual urges. One option is to make his family aware of what he did and let him bear the repercussions as he was indulging in an extra-marital affair. Or just walk away and start anew. It will be difficult, but you will have to start again.
My boyfriend is extremely dominating. If I do anything that he does not approve of, he gets irritated and angry. It as if I have done something terribly wrong. I have to tell him everything I do or want. I can't have my point of view — it is always his point of view. He just wants things to be done his way. I am fed up of his behaviour and can no longer take his dominating behaviour.
Your man wants to have the upper hand as he is of a dominating nature. He wants to control you and is using you. In a relationship, both partners are equal. If his behaviour is getting to you, then you should give a serious thought whether you want to continue in the relationship. Before that tell him exactly how you feel about the situation. He should realise that what he is doing is totally wrong and he can't dictate terms to you.
Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at firstname.lastname@example.org, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012