'My husband is never in the mood anymore...'

Dear Diana,
My husband is always tired. He works six days a week from morning to late night. As we stay in Dahisar, the everyday commute to Churchgate kills him. He just eats and goes to sleep, wakes up and it is time to leave for work. On Sundays, he does not get up till afternoon. All this is affecting his sex drive. I feel he is not like he was when we got married two years ago. Or perhaps he has just lost interest in me. I feel he has a serious medical problem. When I tell him, it hurts his feelings. I really want is to be intimate with my husband again. At the same time, I can understand that he has to work for a living. I work in a kindergarten, so the hours at work are less and my workplace is close by. He says he is tired all the time and says it has nothing to do with me and he loves me. How do I convince him to seek medical help? Or is there another woman on his scene?
– Binal

Illustration/Amit Bandre
Illustration/Amit Bandre 

Dear Binal,
Work and commuting pressures are making your hubby tired, but it also could be an indication of a serious underlying problem. He needs urgent medical attention. His medical condition could be leading to low testosterone levels which perhaps is the cause of a lower sex drive. It could also be due to his lifestyle. May be he needs to look into his diet and if there are any other medical reasons that are causing him to be sluggish. At the same time stop nagging him and putting more pressure on him. By assuming that there is another woman and he has lost interest in you, you are only making things worse for him. It will widen the distance between you two and cause a rift. He also needs to take a break from work for some days. Seek medical care and find a routine that does not tire him.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

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