'My husband is proving to be obnoxious...'

Dear Diana,
I have been married for 10 months. Initially, my husband was caring and helped with the household chores, but now he has been showing his true colours. He has become a couch potato. As soon as he is back from work, he prefers to sit in front of the TV. He does not budge till bedtime. When I complain, he makes a big issue of it. He always comes up with some excuse like he is tired and unwell, so that I do not tell him to run errands. I wonder what is making him behave like this. Last weekend, he slept till noon, ate food and hit the bed again. He tells me this is how he was before his marriage. He further tells me that he changed because he wanted to impress me. Now that we are married, he is going back to how he was. What do I do?
— Nayonika

Dear Nayonika,
He is gradually turning to be his true self. Now that your marriage is almost a year old, he feels he can be the way he was. He no longer wants to help you or try to impress you. He knows you are there for keeps now. Several guys follow this route, they change themselves to impress their women and once hitched, they go back to their old way. You have been taking his nonsense for the past few months, so he feels that he can get away with it. He can't be unwell every single day. You need to tell him exactly how you feel. He needs to know that this is no laughing matter and it is affecting you as well as your health. Sit down and chart out the responsibilities so that each gets equal share of the responsibilities. If he continues with this behaviour, it will lead to marital strife and create havoc in your life.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

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  • Abhishek Oza26-Feb-2016

    Leave him. He is not worth your love.

  • fox28-Feb-2016

    you are from a country who has a history of bold woman like rani laxmibai, jodha, noorjehan etc. jsut show him the woman power. show him whos the boss. your cant carry on like this. dont waste your time making charts like diana says. be practical, use your intelligence to make him stand on his toes. kick him off where it hurts most. he thinks usne billi mar di. now you show him what the billi can marao now.

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