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My live-in girlfriend does not want to marry

Dear Diana,
I'm 36 and I believe I'm running out of time to get married and have a family. I have been with my girlfriend, who is 29, for four years now. I like her and she is a beautiful person and dedicated to me. We live together and she is very special. But she doesn't believe in marriage and is career-oriented. To be honest, even I never felt the need of a wedding ceremony and rituals that usually follow but my thoughts have changed. Whenever I bring up the topic, she bluntly says no. I am very keen on having kids but she isn't up for that now. I find myself lonely in this relationship that seems strong but going nowhere.
- Winston


Illustration/ Satish Acharya

Dear Winston,
All these years, you never cared for marriage and customs, now suddenly you want all that you preferred to give a skip. So it's natural for your girlfriend to resent it. Remember she is 29 and there is still a good many years to go before her biological clock starts ticking. No wonder she is focussed on her career and wants marriage and motherhood to wait. Also, you are 36 and it is not like time is running out for you. It might be a better option to have children when younger, but there are many out there who opt for late parenthood. I feel you need to give your girl some time. You may have your reasons to wed and have kids, it took you a while to understand this, so give her time too. Broach the topic casually and be patient for now.

 

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