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'My mother dislikes my boyfriend...'

Dear Diana,
I'm in a relationship with a warm person who happens to be my office colleague. My mother, however, doesn't approve of him. We are 24 and not yet sure about each other. Right now we are the best of buddies. We get along well. According to my mother, I need someone better than him. To me, he is the most delightful person on earth.
— Janaki

Illustration/Amit Bandre
Illustration/Amit Bandre 

Dear Janaki,
First of all you are not sure about your feelings for him and nor is he about you. So your mother's fears at the moment are unwarranted. She can express her anxieties and apprehensions at a later stage when you are serious about him. Right now you are close pals and when you decide to take the relationship to the next level, you will have to sit down and explain why you feel he is the best bet for you. Your mom appears to have expectations about the guy for you and feels this guy doesn't live up to them.

Dear Diana,
My boyfriend is a good-for-nothing. He keeps changing jobs and is always complaining about everything in life. He was not like this before, but of late he is a changed man. As he knows that I have a well-paying job and asks me for money whenever he wants, he can do what he wants. I feel cheated and want to move on. But he keeps saying that he will change and then again after a few days he is back to his ways.
— Tehmeena

Dear Tehmeena,
As you continue to help him financially, he keeps changing jobs as he knows he is financially secure. Stop heeding to his every request. Why are you being a doormat? Tell him how you feel about the situation and give him a final warning and some time. If he refuses to change, it is better that you end the relationship. It is also clear that he does not care for you. Move on and start afresh — you will be a happier and better person.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at diana@mid-day.com, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

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