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My son always ends up in a fight with other kids

 

He always ends up picking up a fight, gets beaten and what not. My husband thinks it’s because of me that he’s uncontrollable like this. I don’t agree with him. Even his teachers at school have started calling me asking for the reason why he doesn’t get along with other kids. It’s beyond explanation why he behaves this way when I’m not around. In my presence, he’s obedient and sincere. He’s my only child so I tried talking to a counsellor but the behaviour pattern persists. Something must be bothering him, I’m afraid. 
- Saroja



Illustration/ Satish Acharya
 
Dear Saroja,
It appears that you are extremely controlling that is why in your presence he is so well-behaved. He fears you so your watchful eyes stops him from going wild. When you are not around, he goes berserk. To some extent, it is okay for kids to get naughty but if it involves beating other kids and picking up fights, it is but natural that the others will complain as well as the teachers. He may be your only child but some discipline is called for. You need to tell him how he should conduct himself when you are present as well as in your absence.

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