'My wife cheated on me...'

Dear Diana,
My wife tells me our eldest daughter, now 17, is from another guy who she had an affair with. I am devastated by this revelation. Apparently, she couldn't cope with the guilt of keeping it hidden anymore. My mind is in a mess. I really don't have a clue how to deal with her and my family now. We have another daughter who is nine. She tells me that this child is mine. My wife tells me that he was her lover whom she could not get married to. The first daughter was born barely nine months after our marriage. She did not tell the guy either as he then moved away. I don't know who to believe and what to do.
— Tushar

Illustration/Amit Bandre
Illustration/Amit Bandre

Dear Tushar,
If you wife was having a physical relationship with you as well as her lover simultaneously, it would be difficult to guess whose child it is. A paternity test can reveal the truth. But your wife knows better. One way is that you accept it and handle it in a mature way. Are you ready to forgive your wife and accepting that she told you the truth. Or you find this guy and tell him the truth. Whichever option you choose, it is going to cause a lot of heartburn. So before you plan the next course of action, think twice. Remember it will affect the young girl and have a deep impact on her life too. Either you let this secret remain between you and your wife or tell the world and bear the consequences.

Dear Diana,
I am 25 and getting married next month. The stress is killing me and I have become short tempered. The pressure is too much to handle. What do I do?
— Kavita

Dear Kavita,
Just chill and let things run its course. You are not the first person in the world to get married. There are many who suffer from pre-marriage jitters. Remember if you keep worrying, you will look a mess on your big day.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012



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