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'She dumped me, but I still can't get over her'

Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age

Q. I am 55 and was a happy go lucky man until I fell in love with a lady half my age 2 years ago. She led me up the garden path for a year before dumping me. I now nurse a broken heart and, despite my best efforts, am not able to forget her. She is constantly on my mind except when I sleep. How do to get her out of my mind, soul and system? Please help me to get back to normalcy.
A. There's no point feeding you clichés like 'it's better to have loved and lost' or 'out of sight, out of mind' because we both know that's not going to help. I think the best thing to do is try and figure out why she ended this relationship with you. If you believe you did nothing wrong, she is obviously someone who doesn't appreciate you. If she is responsible for why things didn't work between you two, why flog a dead horse? Ultimately, you will have to come to terms with the fact that you have the rest of your life before you and she has no intention of being part of it. To obsess over your relationship will only ruin your ability to have a 'happy go lucky' future with someone more worthy of your affection.

Q. What is the most common cause of sexual problems among men and women?
A. Let's start with how sexual problems are defined. Broadly, these are related to physical or emotional issues that prevent a couple from having a mutually satisfying intimate relationship. For men, the most common problems relate to the prostate, diabetes that leads to a decrease in blood supply to the penis, heart disease, nerve damage to the spinal cord, or low testosterone. For women, common problems include a lack of desire caused by a decrease in oestrogen, thyroid disorders, or pain during intercourse caused by vaginal problems or a lack of lubrication. Drug abuse or certain medications can cause problems too, all of which require the intervention of a doctor.

The inbox is now open to take your most carnal and amorous queries. Send your questions on email to lovedoc@mid-day.com

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