He turns 64, but it's difficult to find a younger soul than Kabir Bedi. Here's a look at the gentle, giant who has always lived life in style

He turns 64, but it's difficult to find a younger soul than Kabir Bedi. Here's a look at the gentle, giant who has always lived life in styleu00a0

By the time this article appears in print, Kabir Bedi will have celebrated his birthday on January 16, 2010. Rather incredibly, he turns 64.

Kabir represents the new Bollywood verityu00a060 has become the new 50, if not the new 40. We have Amitabh Bachchan scaling new peaks at 67, Vinod Khanna in (relatively) fine fettle, the resurgent Naseeruddin Shah approaching the landmark this year and Kabir Bedi looking as fit as a fiddle when one glimpsed him recently in Blue.

Kabir continues to look particularly spiffy; so much so that when Malaika Arora, in the course of being interviewed for a fashion column for us, was asked who she thought were the best-dressed men in the industry, she named Kabir Bedi as one of them.

The first thing that struck me about Kabir, when Pooja Bedi perkily introduced me to her dad way back in the early 1990s, was his immense height; and the way his genial smile lit up the coloured eyes. I came home and told my wife Anita, "Kabir looks like a handsome, but gentle giant."u00a0

Many meetings later, I had asked a T-shirt-and-jeans clad Kabir how he managed to stay so fit and young, and he had laughingly retorted, "A man is as young as the woman he feels." Interesting.

I find Kabir interesting primarily for the practised ease with which he has managed to live life on his own termsu00a0 in the '70s, he threw up his fledgling career in Bollywood, won some measure of success abroad and then made a comeback to India; meanwhile, he married the women (as in the plural) he wanted to, and lived the life he desired.

Kabir's life exudes an exotic air of sophisticated bohemianism. Thanks to my friendship with his daughter Pooja, I was one of the few non-family guests to witness the simple but elegant ceremony that marked Kabir's marriage with third wife Niki at Mumbai's Banganga.

With daughter Pooja

The small gathering was touched when Protima Bedi, his ex-wife, blessed the couple. Pooja says, "When my dad and mom got married, they were very young. They were riding the transformative waveu00a0 the flower power, hippie culture et al which was against the tide. They separated subsequently but they always had immense love and regard for each other."

Protima Bedi's condolence meet also comes to my mind, instantly, for it left an indelible impression on me. Pundit Hari Prasad Chaurasia played the flute magically, while soothing Buddhist chants filled the air. And the image of a composed Kabir standing with folded hands below a sea-facing shamiana, has stayed with me.

I had never met Kabir in his youth, only seen his photographs in ads and watched his films.

His debut Seema (1971) with Simi had the lovely Rafi song 'Jab bhi yeh dil udaas hota hai' picturised on a young Kabir, albeit without his trademark moustache and beard. He also starred in Mahesh Bhatt's directorial debut, the controversial Manzilein Aur Bhi Hain.

u00a0I recently asked Moushumi Chatterjee about Kabir, with whom she had worked in Kachhe Dhaage (1973), Raj Khosla's dacoit-themed follow-up to Mera Gaon Mera Desh, and Chatterjee chattered, "For me, handsome is what handsome does. I met Kabir Bedi for the first time at the Mahableshwar shoot of Kachhe Dhaage.

With his girlfriend Parveen Dusanj

He was accompanied by his daughter, Pooja (a tiny tot then) and wife Protima Bedi, who was expecting their second child Siddharth. Kabir stood out from the crowd because he was unconventional looking. He didn't look Indian; more like an Italian. But it was not his looks that left an impression; I was struck by his straightforward nature. He didn't indulge in politics and was chivalry personified. Since he was a model, Raj Khosla had to work very hard on his performance."

Moushumi also made a very telling remark. She recalled, "Kabir Bedi was restless. I felt as if he was searching for something."

Kabir Bedi's search has taken him from Lahore (he was born there in undivided India in 1946) to London. Kabir was born to a British mom, Freda Bedi, who later converted to Buddhism. His father, Baba Pyarelal Bedi, was a mystic, a spiritual healer. Pooja tells me, "My dad spent his impressionable years in a monastery in Sikkim, with shaved head et al. Dad is very familiar with Buddhist teaching and sects. Do you know, I too have a Buddhist name? It is Karma Saraswati."

In one of Kabir's interviews with me, he had revealed, "At heart, I am a Delhi boy. In 1967, at the age of 21, I came to Mumbai, full of hope and energy. In those days, Juhu was a lovely little village it looked a little like what Madh Island does today. And at Purohit restaurant, you could have a sumptuous vegetarian thali for Rs 5."

Kabir came to Mumbai to be a filmmaker and found a job as the film chief of Lintas and later Benson's, now known as Ogilvy & Mather. He told me, "My bosses were bigwigs like Gerson De Cunha, Alyque Padamsee and Frank Simoes." Kabir was a reluctant model, but took up the job because the "money offered was very good. My first big splash was courtesy the Wills campaign for its king-sized cigarettes 'Start A Long Affair'."

Kabir belonged to the generation of '70s youngsters, who wore bell-bottoms and believed in flower power. He said, "The spirit in those days was to loosen things up a bit, to break free from '60s orthodoxy. People all over the world were demonstrating for peace. The hippy cult and flower power was 'in'.

The Juhu gang, comprising Shekhar Kapur, Mahesh Bhatt, Protima, Shabana, Parveen Babi, Neelam Johar, Jalal Agha, celebrated the spirit. We would gang up every Sunday at my residence at Beach House and have a blast."

Daughter Pooja corroborates, "Bohemian is what I would call Siddharth and my upbringing. We learnt to write ABC on the sands of beaches. We grew up in an environment, where writers, thinkers, poets, people from the ad world and the film industry were constantly thronging our house."u00a0

Kabir's odyssey led him to films: "After my play Tughlaq became one of the biggest hits of its time, O P Ralhan offered me a role in Hulchul (Zeenat also starred in it but we ended up in cameos while Ralhan and Helen turned out to be the hero-heroine) and I came into the limelight with Raj Khosla's dacoit drama, Kachche Dhaage.

However, before I could entrench myself in the Mumbai film industry, my wanderlust took me to foreign shores. I flew on my personal expense to Italy for the screen test of Sandokan and bagged the hero's role."

The hugely successful TV mini-series made Kabir almost as popular as pasta in Italy; and he moved further west to do cameo roles in Hollywood (including the Bond film, Octopussy) rather than insignificant leads in Bollywood, where his career wasn't making much headway, anyway.

Kabir was away from Bollywood for a long stretchu00a0 1977 to 1989. Not surprisingly, his daughter Pooja, describes her father as "an urban gypsy; a five-star gypsy. He travels a lot but always lives in style. He has introduced us to the best wines, fine dining and gourmet cuisine."

When Kabir came back to Mumbai in 1988, he had a short-lived innings as a hero thanks to the success of the Rakesh Roshan-directed Khoon Bhari Maang, in which he played Rekha's husband, albeit one with a roving eye and a murderous streak. Soon, he segued to character roles; his recent endeavours include The Hero and Main Hoon Naa. He has also found a new lady love Parveen Dusanj.

I wouldn't have known so many aspects of Kabir, and consequently not been able to write this piece had Pooja and I not stayed in touch for the past 20 years. Pooja recently recapped, what I had gathered from the snatches of conversations I have had with her over the years.

She said, "I do not remember my father ever shouting at me. If he disapproves of something I have done, he clears his throat and says, 'Ahemu2026darling, we need to talk'. He never imposes his views on me. All he says is 'What I'm saying is from my age, my experience, my perspective. Hear me out but the final choice is yours'. He is a very witty man with an excellent sense of humour. I would call it 'intelligent humour'. He says, 'Live life on your terms' and yet advises one to be law-abiding."

She adds, with daughterly pride, "As a grandfather, he is wonderful. He plays chess with my son Omar, takes the kids for swimming, and every Monday, when he is in town, awaits their return from school so that they can spend time together at his apartment in Beach House."

I have always felt that Pooja, like many daughters, subconsciously seeks the qualities of her father in her man. Pooja seconds me, "My dad is articulate, witty, intelligent, humorous and can talk on any subject under the sun; yes, every woman wants her man to match up to her father. Dad has set very high standards as a role model."

Putting her finger on the one quality she feels she has imbued the most from Kabir, Pooja deliberates, "We allow people to be themselves; just as we revel in our uniqueness."

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