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Just hit him in the b****

By:

Date: 2004-5-31

My last article on violence against women evoked overwhelming and heart warming responses.

The fire burning within women to effect change is inspiring. Their frustration with the arduous wait for the government to send in helicopters and rescue boats (read judicial and social measures) for drowning women, resulted in wonderful conversations on the importance of self-defence for all women.

God helps those who help themselves and given that rape has shot up by an alarming 40 per cent, women need to learn to swim to the shore. Self-defence, which according to me is the only legitimate form of violence, is imperative for survival on land, just like swimming is survival in water.

Given that one of every three women are abused, I feel all women need to learn to make their lives safer on a daily basis by gauging and taking control of situations in which they're to be made a victim. I do a gruelling hour of kick boxing every morning, but self defence and personal safety isnt only pitting a woman against a man in a stand up fight.

There are many other issues from date rape drugs, to dealing with mental intimidation. Here are some tips on how to keep yourself safe and protect yourself.

If someone makes you uneasy and does not respect your boundaries, its important you DO SOMETHING! Say something, yell, leave or fight!
Your voice is a weapon too.

If someone is bothering you in a public place, make a scene. Itll be much more embarrassing for the person than for you! Getting right in to his face and screaming loudly will throw him off.

Yelling, alerts other people and can freak your attacker out. It also helps channel your fear into aggression. Shout No, Help, F*** off, loudly and deeply from your stomach.

If you choose to physically fight remember to be as fierce as possible channelling your adrenaline rush of fear into anger makes you stronger. Strike, dont wrestle. Attack the weak parts of his body. No matter how big and strong he is, his weak spots include his temples, jaw, nose, eyes, throat, groin and knees.

Enrol in a class. Martial arts will take a long time to master, but self-defence classes teach you quick techniques to injure or ward off an attacker effectively enough to be able to get away.

Remember that marijuana or other street drugs, designer or club drugs like ecstasy, sleeping pills or excess alcohol are substances that could render you incapable of saying no or asserting yourself.

Of great concern are date rape drugs like Rohypnol, Gamma Hydroxy butyrate (GHB), and Ketamine Hydrochloride like which are colourless, odourless, and tasteless and can be easily slipped into drinks. The drug Rohypnol, or roofies as its called on the street is reportedly quickly becoming Mumbais date rape drug of choice.

Victims of a drug facilitated rape may not remember what happened, may feel very sick, disoriented and confused when they awake and may be surprised that they felt so drunk with only one or two drinks

1. Dont accept open drinks that come in a glass (alcoholic or non-alcoholic) from those you dont know or trust.

2. When in bars or clubs always get your drink directly from the bartender and do not take your eyes off the bartender or your order; don't let somebody go to the bar for you

3. Never leave your drink unattended.

4. Dont drink from open beverage sources like punch bowls and pitchers

5. Keep your eyes and ears open; if theres talk of date rape drugs or if friends seem too intoxicated for what they have taken, leave the party or club immediately!

It may all seem a bit extreme, but remember, you're worth it!!

poojab@mid-day.com