Illustration/ Sameer Pawar

Dear Diana,

I am a good-looking final-year medical student. Very recently, I fell in love with a very beautiful classmate. She's way more intelligent than I am and that's why I am so crazy about her. While we're close friends, she refuses to see me in any other light. When a common friend asked her if it would work out, if she and I were a couple, she almost immediately yelled a NO! I was sitting nearby and was thoroughly embarassed. My friends were sitting nearby and they started laughing at me. I can't understand what it is that drives me nuts about her. I just know that we're supposed to end up together. I can't even control my thoughts and when I'm supposed to study, all I can think about is her. I've asked her to meet me several times, but have never found the courage to tell her myself how I feel about her. Is being in love always this bad?

Med Man

Dear Friend,

What I can gauge from her behaviour is that she's the type who doesn't her feelings surface to the fore, for fear of getting hurt. She doesn't think you're seriously interested. Or else, you'd have gone up to her and asked her personally by now. Show some nerve and speak what you have to. Some people don't want too many people to be a part of their personal space and prefer keeping the world out while letting only a select few in. On the face of it, while she's denying anything more than a friendship with you, you still stand a chance, if you makethe effort to propose to her. Even if she says no, you can ask her why and if there's something that's holding her back you'll know. Beleive me, it's better to know why than to hurt inside without knowing.

I don't think they'll be able to handle Strike Two

Dear Diana,

M y sister recently married a guy outside our caste and was summarily disowned by the family. My father still gets very angry even if we talk about her. It's not that he doesn't love her, but her disobedience has broken him. I can't see my father like this. Trouble is, I'm in love with a girl who belongs to another religion and I know if I told my parents this, it would destroy them. I can't even back out of this relationship as I really love this girl and wan't to settle down with her. Please help!

Jitesh

Dear Jitesh,

Going by how your parents reacted to yoursister marrying outside their caste, they'll really throw a royal fit in your case. But they're your parents and you should be able to talk to them freely. Ask them how they'd feel (hypothetically) if you'd marry  someone from another religion (of course, with their blessings). If you get the reaction you're expecting, don't bring it up again and forget about the girl and compromise on your love. If you want to be with this girl regardless, tell them straight out about your intentions. Either way, they're bound to find out sooner or later.

He says no to sex!!

Dear Diana,

I'm 21. My boyfriend refuses to have sex with me. He says we should wait until we're married. What is his problem in life? If he had to propose it, would he have liked it if I refused him? I know I'm ready and willing. I also know that he's no saint. Why the hypocrisy?

Sunita

Dear Sunita,

For all you know, he's being a prude and is repressing his desires because he can't act on them. Agreed, you're being the active partner in this, but maybe that's why you've caught him on the back foot and he doesn't know how to react. Either that, or he's a bit of a wuss. Or he's genuinely being gentlemanly. Which is rarely the case.