Illustration/ Satish Acharya

Dear Diana,

I am a wife and a mother but my problem is that I just keep imagining that something will happen to my mother. This started after I had a bad dream. This has made me lose interest in life and I often think of committing suicide so that I don’t see my parents dying. I just cannot control these thoughts and have stopped enjoying life. I hate to go any where without my mom and husband and if my parents even catch a cold, I worry like crazy. I have a great family, beautiful child and patient husband but I can’t look beyond my parents.

Dilkhush

Dear Dilkhush,

Death is inevitable. It’s the one thing you’re sure will happen no matter how much you try to protect your loved ones from this harsh truth. It’s just a phase. Don’t dwell too much on the whys, hows and whens and let go of your now. Enjoy the time you spend with them and live that to the fullest. Make each moment last you a life time. It’s natural for you to worry about your parents if you’ve always been very close to them. But you’re being obsessively depressive about the matter. The more you think about these depressing thoughts, the more you’ll feel sick in your gut about it. Block out these thoughts and spend as much time as you can with your parents. Don’t neglect your husband and child though. They need you too.

I want my first girlfriend back!

Dear Diana,

I like this girl in my computer class and we both loved each other in spite of her knowing about my past. When I found out that she wouldn’t be able to marry me, I briefly went around with another girl who also refused to marry me. Now this other girl has poisoned my ex-girlfriend’s ears against me. What do I do? I want my first girlfriend back.

Deepak


Dear Deepak,

Since when do rebound relationships work? If you broke up with your first girlfriend and were still hurting because of it, your second girlfriend was bound to know. She will be vindictive now that you’ve dumped her. What is really silly on your part is to expect every girl you date to be ecstatic when you ask her to marry you. If there’s a refusal, there’s probably a very good reason behind it. Give your ex some credit. She knows you well and won’t believe everything anyone says about you.

She won’t let me touch her anymore...

Dear Diana,

I was leading a very happy married life for four years. But I believe that my wife has re-ignited an affair with her ex-lover. She doesn’t even let me touch her anymore. Even having my child has not changed her attitude towards me. No matter how much I shout at her, she is still continuing with their relationship. I don’t know what to do.

Abhijit

Dear Abhijit,

Sitting on the matter will not help things. Confront your wife about the situation. Ask her very clearly what it is she intends to do henceforth. Ask her parents to sit her down and have a talk with her. Don’t accuse her of anything unless you have proof. Also try and go to a marriage counsellor to see where you’re going wrong in your relationship. Give this one more shot before you decide to let go of her and approach the courts for cutting yourself loose.