'Am I cheating on my boyfriend?'

Dec 21, 2018, 07:00 IST | Dr Love

I kissed another guy when I broke up with my boyfriend

'Am I cheating on my boyfriend?'

Dr LoveI kissed another guy when I broke up with my boyfriend. We got back again recently, but I didn't mention this to him. Does it mean I was cheating on him? Should I tell him?
Choosing to tell him or not is entirely your call but, if you weren't in a relationship at the time, it seems as if you're beating yourself up by assuming you cheated on him. Do what you believe makes this relationship stronger.

My friends keep calling me socially awkward, which has started to change how I behave in public. I didn't think I was awkward or silly in any way, but their constant criticism has affected me to such an extent that I barely have conversations with new people I meet anymore. I am constantly worried about whether I am saying or doing something wrong. I haven't been on a date for over six months because of this, and don't know how to change anything. My friends mean well, so I don't doubt that they are trying to help, but I don't know what to do about my behaviour. Please help.
If your friends genuinely mean well, they really ought to let you be who you are, because friendship is about acceptance, not criticism. It's about being with someone because you like who they are, not because you want to change them into someone you think they ought to be. If you recognise that their criticism has affected your confidence and changed the way you interact with people, what stops you from choosing to ignore their comments and behave the way you like? You alone can change how you feel about yourself. To give someone else that power will only make it harder for you to meet new people. More importantly, it will give anyone you meet a false impression of what you really are as a person, which may be harmful in the long run.

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