'Am I mistaking her frankness for love?'
I talk with her about any topic imaginable, including sex. She giggles and does not object. We are both married. Whenever I try to come near her though, she maintains a distance.
I have a woman colleague who is very frank with me about almost anything. I talk with her about any topic imaginable, including sex. She giggles and does not object. We are both married. Whenever I try to come near her though, she maintains a distance. I am puzzled by this. I have no objection to her being close to me or at a distance, but I want some consistency to her approach. Should I talk to her about this?
— Binay P
I'm not sure what your intentions are. Have either of you had a chance to speak frankly about this, given that everything else is open for discussion? If you are both married, the only possible relationship you can have is friendship. If that is your intention when you speak of wanting to be close to her, it makes sense to declare that. If you are confused about what she wants, why not ask her? Open and honest communication can save you both a world of trouble and misunderstandings.
What is the best thing I can do to make my relationship more stable? I have been with a girl for two years but don't feel secure in this, which is worrying. Are we doing something wrong? I am always worried that this won't last much longer because of the way I feel, and it makes me sad because I love her a lot and want to be with her. I want to take this to the next stage and be more committed.
Does she feel the same way? Have you both had a chance to talk about this openly? If you don't feel secure, what are you looking for? More honesty? More signs of love or affection? More openness from her? It has been two years, so you shouldn't have a problem discussing these issues with her. At the very least, the sooner you both identify or acknowledge the existence of an issue, the easier it will be to resolve it.
The inbox is now open to take your most carnal and amorous queries. Send your questions on email to firstname.lastname@example.org
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