'Close friend says he has fallen for me...'

Updated: Jul 27, 2020, 07:20 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

I have been giving it a lot of thought and think what he says makes sense, about us trying to be in a relationship. I haven't been in one for years

Illustration/Uday Mohite
Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dr LoveI am a little confused about a close friend who has suddenly fallen in love with me. At least that is what he claims. We spoke about this a few weeks ago and I didn't say anything because he wanted me to think about it and respond. I have been giving it a lot of thought and think what he says makes sense, about us trying to be in a relationship. I haven't been in one for years, and it may be a good idea to be with someone who actually knows me well. At the same time, a part of me is afraid that doing this will alter our relationship forever. If things don't work out, I may even lose the close bond we have shared for years. What should I do?
Getting into a relationship with someone just because you don't really have a better idea sounds like a recipe for disaster. On paper, what he suggests and what you think are both viable, but your fears about this potentially changing things between you are also genuine. It may make more sense to take this slowly and start having conversations about what a relationship will mean. Try going on a movie, for instance, and treat your friend as a date instead of a friend. Explore those feelings and see how you feel. You can't force yourself to fall in love with someone just because they happen to be friends. Give it some time, and you may both find a bit more clarity on which to base your decision.

My boyfriend is supportive about everything I do but constantly criticises my driving and says that women shouldn't be allowed to drive. It is a sexist comment that makes no sense given that he is otherwise not sexist at all. How do I get him to stop doing this?
Why not tell him what you just said, about how sexism cannot be selective? If he loves and supports you, it should be consistent.

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