'I feel my partner is way too sexual'

Updated: 16 March, 2020 07:21 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

We have been together for over a decade. We haven't married because neither of us is interested in that kind of legal relationship, and we have been happy together

Illustration/Uday Mohite
Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dr LoveMy partner is almost 40, and I am 38. We have been together for over a decade. We haven't married because neither of us is interested in that kind of legal relationship, and we have been happy together for all this time, so we see no need to change that now. I don't have any problem with him, but I sometimes wonder about why he is so sexual. He asks me for nude pictures of myself, which makes no sense because we are in an exclusive relationship. Should I be worried about this?
Are you uncomfortable with his demands or do you have a problem with the nature of them? Being sexual is normal, and that can be expressed in a variety of ways. It all depends upon consent, what you are or are not comfortable with, and how you think he intends to use these images. Yes, sending nude images to anyone online is always a massive risk because you don't know where they may end up or how they may be used. At the same time, if this is an expression of intimacy between the two of you alone, you should have a conversation about it to try and understand what he gets out of this.

My boyfriend wants to go to a strip club during a work trip to the United States. I don't know if I like this idea. Should I tell him not to, at the risk of coming across as a prude?
There is nothing prudish about you not wanting him to spend time with naked women. If you don't like the idea, you should make that very clear, so he is aware of where you stand before he makes his own decisions. This isn't about how you feel alone; it is also about why he feels the need to do this. Is it curiosity? A need to experience an alien culture? Give him a chance to talk about why he wants to do this, then tell him how you feel about it.

The inbox is now open to take your most carnal and amorous queries. Send your questions on email to lovedoc@mid-day.com

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First Published: 16 March, 2020 06:35 IST

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