'Only older girls seem to be interested in me'

Nov 13, 2018, 07:04 IST | Dr Love

I have only managed to go on dates with girls who are older than I am

'Only older girls seem to be interested in me'
Dr Love

Dr LoveI am a 23-year-old guy and have been single for a long time. The last time I had a relationship was three years ago and, since then, I have only managed to go on dates with girls who are older than I am. This wasn’t a problem at the start, but it is beginning to affect my self-confidence because it feels as if girls my own age have no interest in me. I have tried changing how I dress and even imitate my friends whenever I can, but this hasn’t helped. I fail to understand why older girls alone seem to like me, and it makes me feel as if there is something wrong with me. Please help.
There is nothing wrong with you. There is also nothing wrong with older girls liking you or you actually getting into a relationship with one of them. The cliché about age being just a number also reflects your maturity, because females mature a lot faster than males and their being attracted to you is actually a sign of your own maturity as opposed to the maturity displayed by your peers. Why does this affect your self-confidence? Why is it important for you to be with someone your own age just because your friends are? The important thing about relationships is about being with people you connect with and want to spend time with. Everything else is irrelevant. Try and focus on that for a change and see if it works for you.

How can I convince my girlfriend that I am in this relationship for the long haul? She doesn’t take it as seriously as I do.
Time alone can convince her. The longer you are in this relationship, the easier it will be for you both to have the same ideas about what you want. To try and force someone to be as intense about it as you are is unfair because it takes time for two people to arrive at a mutual understanding.

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