'My husband's in love with another woman'

Updated: Dec 07, 2016, 15:35 IST | Dr. Love |

My hubby is close to a girl whom he chats with regularly, though he denies it when I ask him. Should I quit this relationship?

I was in a relationship for eight years before a court marriage earlier this year. No one knew about this except close friends. We recently had a fight, after which I apologised. He now says he doesn't love me anymore and that the feelings he once had for me no longer exist. He says he only bears with me because everyone knows about our relationship and marriage. He is close to a girl whom he chats with regularly, though he denies it when I ask him. Should I quit this relationship? I love my husband very much, but I don't know what to do.
— Priya S
I don't know if ending an eight-year relationship makes sense without trying to make it work. The two of you obviously like each other's company, or you wouldn't have been together for as long as you have, and one fight simply isn't serious enough to warrant the dissolution of a marriage. Have you considered counselling? It's obvious that you and your husband both need to iron out a few issues. Speak to him, ask him to consider it seriously because he needs to speak to a therapist too, and encourage him to tell you why he feels the way he does. Communication is pretty much the only thing that can sort this out for you both. Walking away for something trivial just doesn't make sense.

What's the best way to end a relationship without hurting the other person too much? I've been trying to end it with my boyfriend for months now, but he's so sweet that I can never say it. I'm in love with someone else though, so I really want to tell him this as quickly as possible.
You're hurting him as well as yourself by not being honest. If you're not in love with him, he deserves to know the truth. Take him out to dinner and be an adult about this. Speak up. There really is no other way.

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