'She behaves badly with my friends, I want to break up'

May 18, 2018, 07:15 IST | Dr Love

There is nothing wrong with my friends. Is this a good reason to end it or should I give her a chance?

Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dr LoveI want to end my relationship with my girlfriend because she behaves badly with my friends. There is nothing wrong with them. Is this a good reason to end it or should I give her a chance?
If she doesn't respect the people you do, try and find out why she has a problem. Your decision to end this should be based on how you feel about her though, not on how she feels about your friends. She can always avoid your friends, but will you be happy without her? If not your friends, she may have a problem with other people. Or you may have a problem with her friends. Will she end it for that reason? Think about what she means to you before taking any step.

My girlfriend refuses to talk about her ex-boyfriends in any detail, apart from information about what they do and where they live. She doesn't talk about her sex life at all, even though she asks me about my ex-girlfriends and my sex life often. I tell her this is unfair, but she says she's just not comfortable talking about it. I want her to, not because I'm curious, but because I think it's fair that she does if I can be honest enough about my past. This is leading to fights, because she says I am forcing her to talk about stuff she doesn't want to. Am I being difficult or is she the one being unreasonable?
I think you're being unreasonable. You are free to talk about anything you want to, and withhold information about stuff you don't want to. She isn't comfortable talking about her past at the moment, which is a perfectly reasonable explanation. You also say you're not curious, which means you want her to talk about this just to prove a point. It doesn't really matter, so why can't you allow her past to stay there and concentrate on your present and future together? Isn't that a sensible approach?

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