'We fight all the time; should we break up?'
Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
I have been tempted to end my relationship with my girlfriend for a while now, because we have been fighting constantly for a few weeks. The thing is, this happened with my ex-girlfriend too. Is there a pattern here?
Every relationship takes time. You have to get to know each other, understand each other's likes and dislikes. There are no patterns here. It just seems as if you are just not giving each other time. You can't get along with someone completely and instantly, so I suggest you allow yourself, as well your girlfriend, to get to a place of better understanding.
My girlfriend recently admitted to a one-night stand with a colleague during an office off-site. She said she regretted it and didn't want to tell me about it, but decided to because she wanted us to have an honest relationship. I haven't spoken to her since she told me this. I don't want to be with her now, because I don't trust her. At the same time, I love her very much and was very clear about wanting to marry her at some point. I don't know if I should go back to her, because there's no way of knowing if she will cheat on me again. What if she assumes she can do it again if I forgive her this time? I'm confused and don't know what to do. Please help me figure it out.
You want to let go of her, but can't live without her either. It all boils down to how important she is in your life and how much you value her presence. She did the right thing by being honest, and has placed herself at your mercy. If you can't trust her, there is no relationship. If you do forgive her and choose to trust her, you can't go through the rest of your life by forever doubting her. If you trust, you must do so completely. The rest is up to you.
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