Girlfriend chats a lot with colleague

Published: Nov 20, 2019, 06:30 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

She had a massive fight with me recently when I asked if she was interested in him

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

Dr LoveI have begun to have serious doubts about my girlfriend lately, because she spends a lot of time chatting with a male colleague. I don't know if she is cheating on me. She had a massive fight with me recently when I asked if she was interested in him. I suggested she was cheating on me and she was angry for weeks. I know she definitely likes him though, because the two of them chat constantly and it makes me feel very insecure. She says he is just a very good friend, but I am not convinced.

Strong relationships are built upon trust. If you and your girlfriend trust each other, conversations or relationships with other people shouldn't matter. Has she ever given you any reason to doubt her? Do her actions tell you that she is in love with you? If she really liked this colleague as anything other than a friend, would she continue being with you? Dealing with insecurity is always hard, but you can tell a lot about a person from the way they act as well as the way they speak. Just because her friend happens to be male doesn't necessarily make him someone she wants to have a relationship with. Tell her why you feel the way you do, instead of accusing her of cheating. Explain why you are insecure and listen to her side of this as well.

My girlfriend and I went on a weekend holiday and didn't get physically intimate. Does this mean she is not interested in me anymore?

She went with you, didn't she? Why assume she isn't interested just because the two of you didn't have sex? Are you intimate when the two of you aren't on holiday? There are other aspects to relationships, and maybe she just wanted to spend quality time with you. If she isn't interested, she will probably come right out and say it. Try not jumping to conclusions.

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