'Hate that he laughs with other women...'

Updated: 25 August, 2020 07:07 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

My husband's work sometimes involves dealing with women customers. I don't get mad at him because he has to interact with them, but I do get upset when he seems so carefree during those moments

Illustration/Uday Mohite
Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dr LoveI will get straight to the point. My husband's work sometimes involves dealing with women customers. I don't get mad at him because he has to interact with them, but I do get upset when he seems so carefree during those moments. Our relationship has been difficult for over 3 years. We have two small children and I feel as if we have lost the ability to laugh with each other. When I see him laughing heartily with other women, it angers me. When I speak to him about this, he blows me off. What do I do?
— Cathy
Have you considered that these interactions may be therapeutic for him in some way? He isn't in a relationship of any kind with these women. In a professional setting, laughing with customers can be seen as good for business, which may also explain his behaviour. If it angers you, and he blows you off, it's obvious that the two of you need to work on communication. I would suggest you start by putting aside the anger and trying to understand the reason for these lighter moments with other people. Think about what is bothering you, and ask your husband if he feels there is anything you can do to make your own relationship better. It is only through dialogue that you can both arrive at a way forward. Do not shy away from professional help, because it may prevent future misunderstandings.

How do I help my friend who is in love with a woman I believe is wrong for him?
You may have all kinds of reasons for believing she is wrong, but he may have an equal number of reasons to prove she is right. This is always going to be subjective because there are feelings involved. As a friend, you have to support him no matter what. You can be honest about how you feel, but the decision will always be his.

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First Published: 25 August, 2020 04:05 IST

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