'Haven't had sex with my husband for over a month'

Mar 18, 2014, 15:33 IST | Dr Prakash Kothari and Rachna Kothari

Clinical sexologist Dr Prakash Kothari and Counseling Psychologist Rachna Kothari answer your sex-related queries

Q. Hi, it’s over a month and me and my hubby haven't had sex. We love each other very much from past 6 years, and are married for over a year now. He is extremely sweet and caring, but I never get 'turned on' for sex.
— Not in the mood 
A. Inadequate foreplay is usually a common cause for not getting “turned on”. Communication between partners is also vital in foreplay. Please let your partner know what are your likes and dislikes; what makes you feel good and what doesn’t; what things turn you on what things turn you off! The 4 letter word is Talk.

Q. I experience excessive vaginal lubrication during sexual intercourse. What could be the cause?
— Lubrication
A. Physiologically, lubrication occurs in the vaginal wall largely because of sexual arousal. This could increase in certain situations like heightened sexual excitement, vaginal infection or allergy. The best course is to find out the cause and treat it. At times, a small dose of an antihistamine tablet at bed time may prove useful.

Q. I am a 22-year-old girl and have sex with my boyfriend regularly. He usually uses a condom but I’m scared. What if it bursts? I don’t want to get pregnant! Any alternative?
— Scared
A. By and large a condom if used correctly is relatively safe. Your partner needs to put on the condom before penetration. By chance, if the condom bursts, then you may resort to Post-coital Emergency Contraception. The emergency contraceptive pills are freely available over the counter and it needs to be taken within 72 hours of the unprotected sex. Earlier the better! It prevents pregnancy to a great extent.

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