He wants discounts for family & friends!

Updated: Mar 28, 2020, 04:13 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

I keep telling him that this is unethical, even though the company doesn't check, but he says I am being unfair to him

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

Dr LoveI work for a company that deals in electronic products, and I get a discount for things because I am an employee. I offered my boyfriend this discount because he wanted to buy something, and he now expects me to give his family and friends those discounts too. I keep telling him that this is unethical, even though the company doesn't check, but he says I am being unfair to him. I think he is just using me, and I don't like this. How do I deal with it?

You are an adult and your career is separate from your personal relationships. Your boyfriend doesn't really have a choice but to accept it. You can always lie about your company stopping discounts, but lies don't solve the problem. He needs to know that there are lines that cannot be crossed. If this is an ethical stand you need to take, it is one he needs to learn to respect. To disrespect your wishes is to disrespect you. If you want this to work, the two of you will need to start accepting each other's boundaries. Cheating your company isn't the ideal way to save any relationship.

An ex-girlfriend reached out to me after four years and asked if I wanted to have dinner. We used to be very close and even broke up amicably but haven't communicated in all this time. I am hesitant about meeting her because it may mean she wants something from me. Should I just avoid her completely?

If you don't want to engage with her in any way, you can obviously cancel. It's not as if you are being forced to meet her. Why avoid her simply because you assume she will want something from you though? You always have the option of meeting her and finding out what she wants, before making any other decision. Don't overthink this.

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