How can I go on a holiday with my ex?

Published: Dec 26, 2019, 06:20 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

I don't know how we will manage to pull this off though, and am afraid of how it may ruin the whole thing for everyone

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

Dr LoveMy boyfriend and I broke up a few weeks ago after having a massive fight. We are all travelling together next month though, with common friends, on a trip we planned while we were still a couple. We paid a lot of money for it and can't cancel because it will ruin things for everyone. I don't know how we will manage to pull this off though, and am afraid of how it may ruin the whole thing for everyone. How will I be able to handle this?

The thing about adults is, we sometimes have to deal with situations we aren't comfortable with because those are the cards we have been dealt with. We take it on the chin. I suggest you reach out to your ex-boyfriend, tell him why this can be potentially awkward for you both as well as for your common friends, and suggest the possibility of getting along until the trip ends. If he agrees, that makes things simple for everyone. If he disagrees, this will be as miserable for him as it will be for the rest. If he's smart, he will make the right decision.

I have been thinking a lot about my relationship, and believe it is over. I have a number of reasons for feeling this way but haven't said them out loud to my girlfriend. Maybe she thinks it is over too, but hasn't said anything because she is waiting for me to say something? Should I just ask her? I don't want it to end if it isn't over.

You think it's over but don't want it to end? Not speaking about it doesn't resolve either scenario. If you want to fix something, shouldn't you start by acknowledging that something is broken to begin with? Not speaking to your girlfriend only makes things worse because she isn't going to be able to read your mind. The sooner you have this conversation, the better it will be for you both, so I suggest you give her a call.

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