'I cheated on her a month before our wedding'
I had a one-night stand with a colleague a month before my wedding and my fiancée found out about it. I have tried to tell her again and again that it was a one-off thing, but she no longer trusts me...
I had a one-night stand with a colleague a month before my wedding and my fiancée found out about it. I have tried to tell her again and again that it was a one-off thing, but she no longer trusts me. I know it was my fault and I was stupid, but I want her to forgive me. The funny thing is, I no longer trust myself. Will I ever be able to commit to someone again?
It all boils down to how important your relationships are to you. This impending marriage didn't prevent you from cheating on your bride to be, but it doesn't necessarily mean you will be incapable of fidelity for the rest of your life. You need to do a bit of soul-searching before you start trying to get your fiancée to forgive you. It's her call entirely, obviously, considering her ability to trust you is of enormous importance when it comes to her decision to marry you. If she chooses not to forgive, you really have no one to blame but yourself.
A friend of mine has been married for two years and I have very strong reasons to believe she may be in an abusive relationship. I have asked her about it repeatedly, but she says I'm exaggerating. Are there signs of abusive behaviour she should be on the lookout for, in order for her to take what I say seriously?
There always are signs. Unreasonable displays of anger, for instance, or unrealistic expectations from a partner, inability to respect a person's privacy, any form of violence, or an inability to control feelings. Maybe your friend needs to understand if and when any of these boundaries are being crossed before she starts to evaluate her partner's behaviour. If you spot any of these signs, point them out to her and ask her to consider speaking to a therapist. Naturally, if her partner is abusive or violent in public, you have the law on your side.
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