I feel like I am molesting my wife

Published: Oct 15, 2019, 05:12 IST | DR Love |

I love my sons, but they avoid me, probably because they have been brainwashed by their mother

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

Dr LoveI have been married for 10 years and love my wife dearly. We have kids and a satisfying love life. I have recently developed a habit of fondling my wife's private parts, when no one is looking. She sometimes moans and sometimes stays quiet. Is this considered sexual harassment? — AV

Your wife and you are adults in a relationship. Part of this relationship will be sexual because physical intimacy is an important part of marriage. If you think you are sexually harassing her, shouldn't you ask her if she has a problem? Sex must be consensual. If she has a problem with it, she has a right to tell you, so I suggest you ask.

I am 43 and have been trying to divorce my wife for the last two years. I filed for it based on mental cruelty, but she has not agreed to it. I have been living separately from her and my two sons aged 12 and 8, in the same city. I love my sons, but they avoid me, probably because they have been brainwashed by their mother. At first, this experience made me think I would never get into another relationship again, but I sometimes feel like giving myself another chance. I recently downloaded a dating app. I am at peace with myself and don't need a relationship. I am worried if this decision to date will antagonise my sons further and create more complications in life though. Please guide.— PC

You have a right to happiness. I suggest you separate that right from your responsibilities or your feelings towards your wife and children, and focus on what you think is best for your well-being. Getting a divorce first may make sense, if only to provide you with a sense of closure. Your relationship with your children will evolve and get easier when they are older and have a chance to communicate and understand you better.

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