I know nothing about my girlfriend

Published: Nov 04, 2019, 06:38 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

I know nothing about what she reads, what her interests are, what she spends money on, whether she collects anything — and she knows everything about me

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

Dr LoveI wanted to surprise my girlfriend with a special gift for her birthday, but everything I thought of was uninteresting because I realised she has no hobbies. I thought about this for hours and came to the conclusion that she has never discussed anything about what she likes doing when we are not together. I know she likes television, but that is all. I know nothing about what she reads, what her interests are, what she spends money on, whether she collects anything — and she knows everything about me. Is she not telling me these things because she doesn't take this relationship seriously enough? I want to know her better, but this is bothering me more than it should, and I don't know what to do.

If you have nothing to give her, why not simply spend the day with her and let her decide what she would like to do? If you don't know enough about her, it doesn't mean she is withholding information; it simply means you share more than she does. Give it time, ask her questions, try and understand what her likes and dislikes are, and you will start to know her better. Her idea of downtime may be radically different from your own but doesn't mean she has no interests just because they don't match yours.

My brother wants me to consider dating his best friend because he says he's a very nice guy. I don't think he's nice at all because I have seen him look at me in a manner that can only be described as creepy. I don't want to hurt my brother's feelings, so I am considering going on a date or two just to make him happy before telling him I am not interested. Would this be right?

Why would you put your brother's feelings above your own? If you don't want to date someone, your brother is the one who should take your feelings into consideration, not those of his friend.

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