I like the girl I had a brief affair with

Published: Nov 16, 2019, 06:23 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

I think she flirts with me too, every now and again, and I don't think she is dating anyone at the moment

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

Dr LoveI had an affair with this girl for a couple of weeks, and we mutually decided it wasn't working out and ended it. It's been six months since then, and I can't seem to get her out of my mind. I have chatted with her a few times and we really enjoy each other's company. I think she flirts with me too, every now and again, and I don't think she is dating anyone at the moment. I am starting to think we can get into a relationship because we seem to have a lot in common. At the same time, given that we had an affair, I don't know if we can take this seriously because I don't know if she will ever look at this as anything more than a fling. What should I do? I really think this could work but am afraid to even suggest it.

Relationships don't work based on how they begin, but by how much work is put into them. If the two of you get along and enjoy each other's company, why assume this will end badly without even trying? Talk to her, find out if she's even interested in a relationship, and take it one step at a time. Don't try to predict how this will end when it hasn't even begun.

I recently got engaged to a woman who has a 5-year old child from an earlier marriage. I love her very much but am worried because being a bad stepfather may ruin my relationship with her. Is there anything I can do to prevent that from happening?

You love her and, I assume, this love extends towards her child as well. You won't be a bad stepfather if you treat her child with the same love and respect you give her. Spend time with them both, allow them to get comfortable with you, and try not to overthink this. Try and appreciate the fact that you have been gifted a new family and focus on that instead.

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