I want him to open up about his troubled childhood

Sep 07, 2018, 06:06 IST | Dr Love

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I want him to open up about his troubled childhood

Dr. LoveI want my boyfriend to open up about his troubled childhood, but he keeps changing the topic. What can I do to get him to speak more?
He obviously has his reasons and will open up when he feels comfortable enough. You can't force someone to speak about things they aren't comfortable with, because that isn't fair. Does he compel you to speak about things you don't want to?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 12 years. We have always had a good time with each other, but the problem is trust. He has always lied and cheated and says we should end it whenever I confront him. I don't want to lose him because I love him. He doesn't take my calls and, apart from sex, we have no communication or trust. He has good friends, but I don't have a single friend in my life. When he is with friends, he ignores me. What should I do? Should I just break up with him or tell him how I feel about this relationship?
— Simran S
It seems as if your boyfriend is taking you for granted, to be honest. If he has been cheating on you for over a decade and assumes you will accept it because you have all this time, you are doing yourself a disservice and simply encouraging him to go out and lie again. If he wants to end it, why don't you? It doesn't seem as if he takes you seriously enough because, if he did, he wouldn't cheat on you. Also, if you haven't told him how you feel about this relationship after being with him for 12 years, it doesn't sound like a strong, healthy bond. Relationships are more than just physical intimacy. This just sounds like a one-sided relationship of convenience that allows him to have sex with you and commit to nothing else. Do a bit of introspection, be honest with yourself and make a decision that is right for you.

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