I want to break up, but he doesn't!

Updated: May 01, 2020, 04:16 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

I want to end this with understanding but am afraid it will turn ugly because he will just not get it

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

picI want to end my current relationship with a guy I have dated since we were in college. We now have successful careers and I think I have outgrown him. He doesn't see it this way and wants us to plan a future together. I want to end this with understanding but am afraid it will turn ugly because he will just not get it. In fact, it is his inability to understand me anymore that has brought me to this point, but he won't see that either. I don't want to lose a friend who has been with me through thick and thin just because I don't have romantic feelings for him anymore. Help!

If you are sure about this not having a future, you don't really have a choice but to tell him how you feel irrespective of how you believe he may react to that information. The fact that you have been friends for a long time may make this easier to handle, because he may want you in his life the same way you do. If he chooses to let go of your friendship because he cannot see you with someone else, you may have to accept it. Either way, you cannot lie to yourself about how you feel, because a relationship like that cannot last.

My husband makes me feel as if I am worthless, just because he works, and I don't. He doesn't consider my opinion even when we discuss buying a new TV set and thinks this is perfectly okay. He is kind and loving, except for anything that has to do with finance. I don't know how to cope with this.

Financial issues can tear any relationship apart, so I suggest you have a conversation with your husband about how his behaviour is making you feel. If he is kind and loving, he shouldn't have a problem making changes. He also needs to recognise that being a housewife makes you the harder working of the two.

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