I want to cut off all ties with my family

Published: Mar 18, 2020, 05:08 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

I am considering making a break and ending all ties with them, because it feels like the right thing to do

Illustration/ Uday Mohite
Illustration/ Uday Mohite

picI have been struggling with members of my family for many years now. We don't see eye to eye on anything, they have never been supportive of any of my decisions, and the older I get, the harder it is for me to connect with any of them in any meaningful way. I am considering making a break and ending all ties with them, because it feels like the right thing to do. I have given this a lot of thought, and believe it is something I need to do for my mental well-being. Is there anything else I should consider before going ahead?

Families are an important social construct for the roles they play in our lives, starting with their ability to nurture us when we are young, and act as a safety net and support system as we get older. If you feel as if your family has failed on all fronts, you must do what makes sense to you. It's impossible to condone or reject a decision like this without access to more information. Also, the only people who are capable of understanding this are you and the members of your family. If you feel this is what you need to do to protect yourself, you are well within your rights to make that decision. It isn't irrevocable either, because you can always reach out to them, or vice versa, if you change your mind in the future.

My boyfriend is a great guy when we are together but turns into this macho idiot in public. He calls me 'babe' in front of his friends, which I hate. He thinks it's cool, but I don't, and he refuses to understand that. How do I get him to stop this?

If he believes being disrespectful in public makes him cool, maybe you should teach him that it's not okay in public too. Explain to him, in front of his friends, why you don't like being called babe. His friends may also learn something in the process.

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