I'm married, but I have a crush on my friend
Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
I am 26 years old and have a crush on a friend of mine. I am not in love with him, but am attracted to him because he's smart and good-looking. I kissed him once after getting drunk at a party. I was embarrassed later, but we have spoken since that incident and I think I now have feelings towards him. The problem is I have been married for two years. My husband is good-natured, but simple and the complete opposite of who I am as a person. I am confused. What should I do about this situation?
— Pranali M
I'm not sure what you want help with. Are you saying you are not happy with your husband? Do you like him, but feel as if he is not the right person for you? Are you considering an affair with this friend because you have feelings for him? A lot of these doubts creep in after two people spend a certain amount of time together. If you love your husband, and want to make this marriage work, there are things you can both do to make sure the bond you have grows stronger with every year, rather than weaker. You assume you have feelings for someone else because you are clearly dissatisfied with your current relationship. I suggest you think about why you're not satisfied, and whether or not your husband is someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, because you must have felt that way at least when you decided to marry him. Relationships require work and are not always easy to maintain, but running away and looking for other options isn't a solution either. You need to do a bit of introspection to figure out what you want, how you or your husband can change, and if you want him in your life at all. Your friend is just a distraction until you figure out where you stand in your marriage.
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