'In mental anguish over daughter's marriage'

Mar 02, 2014, 11:34 IST | Dr Roopa Patel

To know what the tarot cards say about you, please provide the following information: Your full name and date of birth  Ask only one question at a time. Give birth dates of people involved in the question. email: askroopa@gmail.com

Q. We are from south India. My daughter wants to get married to a guy but their horoscopes do not match. Also she is facing problems on the job front. Please help.
A. Astrology can make exact predictions but the practitioner must be able to weigh the various aspects to perfection. But they can go wrong and so can my advice. The final decision as to what course you want to take will have to be yours. One thing I believe in is that there is karma and God.

You have drawn the 9 of swords in your reading which indicates your mental anguish. According to your tarot spread you have imaginary fears. The astrological predictions have added to your fears and you feel terrible things will happen should your daughter marry this man. I don't see anything that should make you stop this marriage. Your daughter will finally get her way so it will be better for you to gracefully give in. I don't see major indications that suggest a divorce or separation. But I do see that she will not have an easy marriage with anyone. Her lessons in life come through her marriage. Regarding her job, I think the young couple are planning to go abroad. You must allow them to go. Things will be better for them there. Good luck.

Still in love with ‘cheating’ boyfriend

Q. I am a 17-year-old woman. I have liked a guy since I was 15 and he was 22. Later, he proposed and I said yes. After he went abroad for his studies, I heard people talking about his girlfriend of the last six years. So we broke up. But even after a year, I am unable to forget him. Will I get him back or is the story of the girl in his life true?
A. You have drawn the strong card of Justice indicating that there is Justice operating in your life. I don't know more about you ...but have you done something similar to another person? This could be a kind of nemesis that you are experiencing. In any case this is not the right time to agree to a proposal or marry. This is not the age for settling down.

You have also drawn the card of The Knight of Wands in a prominent place in the spread, which indicates your impulsive nature and impatience with things. You want immediate gratification. This is precisely the reason why it is not in your favour to have a proposal or a romantic love relationship at such a young age . Only after gaining some maturity should you decide what you really want in life.

Want to leave conservative in-laws
Q. I have been married for 10 years and have a loving husband. I also have a seven-year-old son. I had to adjust with my in-laws and leave my job to look after my son. But things are worse now. My in-laws recently went to USA to my brother-in-law's place and now, my mother-in-law has started comparing me to my sister-in-law. My son is also acting weirdly, giving my in-laws another reason to pick on me. Are there chances of us shifting? Will shifting
benefit us?
A. Your mother in law is a difficult woman and has been very conventional in her approach. She is dominating and both her husband and her son give in to her for the sake of peace. You have drawn the Queen of Wands reversed in your spread, which indicates there is.
There is a good chance for you to move into a place of your own. You can look forward to peace and balance. It will take you time to adjust to this altered happy situation. Please leave gracefully and keep the door open for improving your relationship with your in laws. Also please gear up to take charge and to run the house as efficiently as your
You need to be prepared for a delay of sorts in moving. Either your husband's transfer will be delayed or the apartment will not be ready. Once things are finalised, do not let the delays irk you. You should be relaxed and be content.

Choosing between marriage and love
Q. I have been married for the last 25 yrs. Though my husband is reasonably successful and I am financially comfortable, I have always been treated very shabbily by my husband in front of others, particularly his relatives. I have always felt degraded. And I also never found love in our marriage. Our son has also been subjected to the same. However, the last two months or so, I have noticed a great change in my husband. He is showering me with care and affection. He has also started to get physically intimate after a long time. Meanwhile, in the last 5 years or so, I gradually became involved with another man, with whom I experienced real love. But now, this man wants to move away and has advised me to reciprocate my husband's feelings. However, I am sure if we part he will be totally heart-broken. I am confused. Please guide me.
A. There are a lot of uncertain cards in your spread. First of all, please do not take any decision impulsively. Try to find out why your husband has suddenly changed after 25 years. You need to understand that if you are to make the right decision. Remember, 25 years is a lifetime and there has to be a valid reason for this change. A person does not change overnight for no apparent reason. That is the key ... why?

I don’t know the situation with your friend but it seems that he does not have a family of his own. What has been the basis of this relationship? Is he free to make this relationship legal? If he really cares for you as much as it seems, why you have not left your marriage and married him by now? That says a lot, doesn’t it? Are you using him to alleviate your pain but are not willing to go all out and accept him as a husband? Is that fair to him?

As I see it, money and respectability are the main issues. Does your friend have less money than your husband? It takes a lot of courage to take the leap. It is easier to just let things go on as they are, isn’t it?

It is very admirable on the part of your friend to be so generous. You should be grateful that you have known a decent man who does not want to disturb your life. Or is it?
From your cards I don’t see you as someone who can judge people or situations correctly. You have drawn the card of Judgment reversed. You might have jumped to a wrong conclusion. From your Tarot spread I don’t see you walking away from your family despite all that has happened. You have drawn a family card coupled with a card which indicates lack of movement. There is no energy in the spread which is required to make major changes in life. It is always difficult to balance two relationships and I would not suggest that you go that way. You seem to come from a conventional environment and may not have the courage to break the mould even if you discovered that you wanted to. Staying back and ending the love relationship might be a safer option though you risk missing out on love for the rest of your life.
The other choice will be a steep climb. But there could be a rainbow at the end of it. There is a price involved in either decision. It for you to decide what price you are willing to pay. Good luck.

The views expressed in this column are personal and Dr Roopa Patel will not be held liable for any advice given. For further consultation, workshop details and to buy cards, please send an email to askroopa@gmail.com or call +919867681848


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