'My guy can't handle the pressures of being in a relationship...'

Jul 02, 2015, 06:00 IST | Dear Diana

My guy suddenly decided to break off with me last week. It came as a shock to me

Dear Diana,
My guy suddenly decided to break off with me last week. It came as a shock to me. I don't know what prompted him to take such a drastic step. I am not only hurt, but devastated. As I wanted to know the reason behind his decision, I confronted him. After a great deal of persuasion, he told me he does not want to be tied down and can't take the pressures of being involved with someone. Being with me was too much for him to handle. Not that I was a high maintenance woman. He says he does not want to get emotional about anything. He now only wants me to be his friend, but this is not what I want. I am 27 and he is 30. We had spoken about a future together. Why then did he be with me for four years? He made me feel the most important person in his life. He led me on and told me I was the one for him. Though he has moved away, I can't get over him. What do I do?
— Vaishali

Dear Vaishali,
You may still pine for him, but he does not want you in his life. He has decided that he does not want to be in a relationship with you. You did not see it coming, so you are heartbroken. There is no point being after him and pleading with him. Just let him be. He has told you he cannot take the pressures of being in a relationship, but there could be more to it. Time will heal all wounds, but for now you have to get going. You must stop thinking about him. You have to accept that it is over and move on. Many people go through a lot of hurt and pain before they find their right partner. This is the first time you have had your heart broken, but eventually you will learn to deal with pain and rejection — and even get over it.

Diana will solve it!
Write to Diana at diana@mid-day.com, or fax her on 24112009. You can also post letters to Dear Diana, Mid Day, Peninsula Centre, Dr S S Rao Road, opp Mahatma Gandhi Hospital, Parel, Mumbai 400012

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