'My husband's private part is too big for me, hurts during sex'
Clinical sexologist Dr Prakash Kothari and Counseling Psychologist Rachna Kothari answer your sex-related queries
Q. I’m a Chinese girl living in Mumbai. I’m married to someone from South Africa. I find his private part too big for me and it hurts me during sex. Is there any solution? I have already applied a local anaesthetic but of no help.
— Size Matters
A. There is Indrani asana (position) described in the Kamasutra which can be of help to you. Here, the woman lies on her back and adopts a knee-chest position (bending her knees close to her breasts). She keeps her legs wide apart and rests them on either side on the man’s chest or his armpits. This will enable you to control your husband’s to-and-fro movements, and you will be comfortably be able to adjust yourself by sliding with every thrust. This pose is useful in a situation in which the man has a large penis and the woman a small vagina. This was supposed to be the position adopted by Indrani, wife of Lord Indra. Hence the name Indrani asana.
Q. I feel burning and pain in the penis after sex. What is my problem?
A. This situation could occur because of infection in the urethra or, more commonly, in the prostate. In clinical practice the most common cause for this is too frequent or too infrequent orgasms (through masturbation or intercourse), i.e. when one hasn’t indulged in intercourse for something like four weeks, and then, suddenly indulges in it four times in a day! What is needed is to regularize your sexual habits. Avoid having spicy food during this period when burning continues. If the problem persists, you may consult a Urologist.
Q. I am approaching menopause and am aware about the problem of painful penetration during sex. I don’t want to take Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT). Can you suggest any natural way to enhance my female hormone?
A. Soya bean (tofu) in particular and green leafy vegetables are rich source of estrogen. Yoga especially practicing Surya Namaskar regularly may help in regulating the hormone balance.