My husband texts other women

Updated: Dec 28, 2019, 07:49 IST | DR Love | Mumbai

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Illustration/Uday Mohite
Illustration/Uday Mohite

Dr LoveI have serious doubts about my husband being faithful to me. He texts women all the time, even though I have repeatedly asked him not to. He says they are colleagues, and this is work, but I have seen him smiling a lot while communicating with them, and they are almost always young, beautiful women. He refuses to stop and accuses me of being childish. I think he needs counselling but will obviously not consider it. How do I make him stop?
This isn't about you being childish or him believing he isn't doing anything wrong, as much as it is about a lack of communication and mutual respect. If he thinks he is entitled to chat with women, you are also entitled to feel threatened by his behaviour. If he isn't taking your feelings seriously, you may have to insist that he speaks to a neutral third party or risk ruining this relationship. There are boundaries that must be set, but they have to be mutually agreed upon because the two of you are equals. The sooner he gets that, the better. As for him being faithful, that is something only you can have an opinion on. If you have genuine reasons to doubt his fidelity, you should call him out.

I have been trying to ask a girl out for coffee for a month, but she doesn't respond to my calls. She is the one who gave me her number when I asked, so I don't know what the problem is. I have called three times, and she doesn't even return my calls. Should I keep trying, or just give up and move on?
I suggest you send her a text message instead of calling and ask if she would like you to stop reaching out. If she doesn't respond, you finally have your answer. If she does, she may be able to explain why she hasn't been returning your calls. There is no point trying forever, obviously.

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