My past has left me disturbed and confused

Updated: 10 December, 2018 08:21 IST | Dr Love | Mumbai

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Dr. LoveWhen I was 8, my father divorced my mother and married another woman. We faced a lot of difficulties and barely had enough to eat. My mother wanted to remarry, but the man didn't want all her children. We are 4 brothers and 2 sisters, and he was only ready to accept 2 children. My mother refused, so he agreed to her terms provided she didn't live with him. He gave her one room in a slum and came there often. The people there didn't know they were married though, so they started hating us and we had to move. I think those years of trauma have made me mentally disturbed. After completing my Std XII exams, I began working, but I have poor communication skills because I come from an Urdu medium school and don't get jobs easily. I got married after some time and told my husband everything, but his mother and sister started hating me because I came from a poor family. They made me do all the house work. I tried to commit suicide twice and began fighting with my husband every day. We separated six months ago, and he hasn't called me since. I got a promotion at work and fell in love with a guy who wants me to divorce my husband and marry him. I love my husband but don't want to live with him. I like this guy at work but don't want to marry him. What should I do?
— Saba M
I am a little overwhelmed by your story, to be honest, because there are so many aspects to it that I'm not sure how to respond. You need to speak to a professional, because a lot of what you say reveals signs of depression and trauma. A professional counsellor will need to spend time with you, understand you better, and then help you come to terms with your situation or arrive at an informed decision. I'm afraid a simple solution just does not exist.

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First Published: 10 December, 2018 06:00 IST


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